How can I heal after loss? Will I ever find a new normal without that special person in my life? Can I be well again?
Healing and wellness is often a choice. That may sound callous, and we need time to “lick our wounds” and find methods that work uniquely for us in our grief. But over time, we can choose to remain in our pain or we can choose to actively work on healing. No one said it was easy, fast, or fun, but it is possible. And once you make up your mind to heal, you start feeling progressively better and on your way to YOUR new normal.
What are some things you can do to start to heal after a big loss?
• Focus on the positive memories of that person, rather than the pain caused by the loss. Display happy photos, tell funny stories of them.
• Exercise — take walks in nature or set a goal to work towards, like a race. Exercise produces chemicals in your brain that help you feel better.
• Nutrition — eat well. Get more green vegetables (natural stress relief), eat less sugar, drink more water (half your weight daily in ounces) and less alcohol (which is a depressant).
• Practice deep breathing or meditation to calm your nervous system and relieve stress. This can also help you sleep better.
• Journal — write out your feelings: the good, the bad and the ugly. No one ever has to see what you wrote. Burn it if you like, but it’s very cathartic, and you may be surprised at what comes out.
• Get support — find a support group, a therapist, or talk with friends and family. We all need to talk it out. You may want to advise them before you start that they don’t need to “fix” you, just listen. Avoid negativity.
Most importantly, expect to heal and be patient. Take good care of yourself—even be a little selfish while you heal. You will be of much more benefit to others if you are taking care of you.
Life is tough on us sometimes, but we are all in it together. Reach out, be open to trying new things—like energy healing modalities. Find what you are most comfortable with to help you heal in your unique grief. No one else knows how you truly feel or what’s best for you . . . except you.
I found my new normal after a long journey following the trauma of losing multiple children and a long-term marriage. It can be done. Trust that and START. I’m happy to support you finding your NEW NORMAL. Be well.