​Self-care isn’t always about indulging yourself in manicures and late-night movies (although those are really important). Self-care is about doing what’s needed to have the life you want, no matter how difficult it may seem: Speaking up to your best friend or your boss, recycling the clothes you’ll never fit into no matter how many diets you try, asking for professional help so you can resolve your relationship or insomnia or whatever isn’t working. Now, more than ever, is the time for you to take care of you. The stronger and more centered you are, the easier it will be to weather what crops up.
 
Following are ten ways to step up your positive attitude and overall well-being:

1. Say what you mean. Are you afraid to express yourself because you’ll hurt someone’s feelings or your words might be misconstrued? Speaking up is much more than just saying “no.” When you don’t express yourself or stuff your feelings, people don’t have the opportunity to see and know the real you. Being true to yourself not only empowers you, it empowers those around you. So don’t be afraid to speak your truth. When you say what you mean you honor yourself and you give others the chance to know you, the real you, the one they’re longing to know.
2. Take baby steps. Whatever your goal, you don’t have to get there today. Or even tomorrow. Trying to get there too fast can cause stress and frustration and bring up feelings of “I’m not good enough” or “why can’t I be like him/her?” Remember the wise saying, “All good things come to those who wait.” Picture the Buddha and see yourself smiling and patient. Make one new change in your lifestyle and see how that goes. When that’s working well, then add something else. Take baby steps. There’s no hurry.
3. Let go of the past. Isn’t it amazing how hard it is to let go? Those events that transpired eons ago—the raise you didn’t get, the relationship that failed, a family member saying you’ll never amount to anything—can still create feelings of fear, anger, shame, guilt. And all that’s doing is ruining your current life. It’s time to let those puppies go. You don’t have to be stuck with that baggage. Coaching, energy healing, therapy, meditation, inner child work, tapping, there are hundreds of methods to help you access those memories and transform them. And when you rewrite the past, you create a brand new present.
4. Connect with Spirit. It doesn’t matter whether you believe in God or the Divine or simply an energy that binds us all together. Seeing, understanding, believing, or knowing about that connection serves to calm you. You could be exercising or deep breathing or just looking at a flower, something that transports you out of your typical awareness. When you’re in that “zone,” you feel a deep inner peace that can transcend time and space. Those little moments are like nectar to your body, mind, and soul.
5. Appreciate yourself. To paraphrase Elizabeth Barrett Browning, “How do you love yourself? Can you count the ways?” Appreciation goes farther than skin deep. It penetrates to the core of your being and radiates beyond. The more you love yourself, the more lovable you become. We all have our flaws and faults, but this is about finding the things you like. Do you love your eyes, the way you support your friends and family, how you find joy in the little things? Start a list of the things you appreciate, at least one per day, and tell yourself how much you love that quality. Before you know it you’ll be in love with YOU.
6. Reward yourself. Are you searching for acknowledgment? Recognition? A little praise? You don’t have to wait for someone else to give it. Give it to yourself! It’s easy to overlook all the little things you do—cleaning the house, exercising, finishing that painting. But all those things matter and create space for the bigger things—an inviting home, a well-toned body, winning first place at the art show. Acknowledge your successes and reward yourself (the reward begins a pattern of self-acknowledgment). Take a bubble bath with lighted candles and soft music. Indulge in that dark chocolate. Buy yourself a new dress. You deserve it!
7. Get up and move. Exercise may be a dreaded word, but the body is designed to move. Exercise improves your mood, increases endorphins, and decreases stress. So get up and move! You don’t have to join a gym. Even little movements can help. Try stretching or ease into yoga or qigong. Walking outdoors is fantastic. Or dust off your stationary bicycle or elliptical machine. If you’re at work and you only have a minute or two, get up from your desk and take a brisk walk around the office. Movement makes the body happy and a happy body means a happier you.
8. Be grateful. Giving thanks is one of the most important aspects of self-care. If you do nothing else, be grateful for who you are and what you have. As in self-appreciation, find something to be thankful for—your job, your friends, your spouse, your health, your house, the food you eat, the ground under your feet. Nothing is too small. Giving thanks creates a beautiful vibration that increases your prosperity and attracts more to be thankful for. [Try the thirty-day experiment in Thank and Grow Rich by Pam Grout.]
9. Laugh and play. When was the last time you felt like a little kid? Remember playtime? Hopscotch, jump rope, hide and seek, jacks? Games that made you laugh and squeal with pleasure? Your inner child is still with you, wanting to come out and play. Fun lights up your soul and makes you radiate with joy. So dip your toes into a nearby lake, pull out the croquet set, play some badminton or horseshoes or miniature golf. Get your joy on! You might be surprised how wonderful you feel.
10. Follow your dreams. Now that you’ve revitalized your inner child, take a moment and recapture your dreams. What did you want to be when you grew up? Dreams are fueled by your imagination, and your imagination is endless. If you wanted to be a painter, what about a painting class? If you thought about writing, try an online course or join a writer’s group. If you wanted to be an astronaut, visit a space camp. It’s never too late. Creativity and exploration are like candy to your soul. So let your imagination loose and explore. You’ll feel recharged and restored.

 
There’s no guarantee that life won’t throw you more curve-balls. As we all know, it’s a crazy obstacle course. But if you use some or all of the steps here, you will be a happier, healthier, and more prosperous YOU.

[Originally published in the Conscious Life Journal, ​July 2018]

Do you love yourself only when you feel good? What about when you fail a test, don’t get a raise, or can’t fit into your new clothes? What if you could really love yourself all the time?
 
The term “self-love” means the love of oneself, the instinct or desire to promote one’s own well-being. True self-love is not narcissistic or self-indulgent but an awareness of your inner power.  Self-love acknowledges who you are and what you like. Those stirrings inside you (a love of nature, playing with color, writing songs, rescuing animals) are meant to point your way. By cultivating your gifts, you show your true passions to the world. Your light illuminates the way for others and allows them to shine as well.
 
How do you start loving yourself? Here are five ways to begin the journey.
 
1) Address self-sabotage. Does your inner voice say you’re not good enough, not smart enough, not pretty enough? Those negative thoughts stem from past experience and are lodged in your unconscious. Before you can practice self-love you need to let them go. You can heal these thoughts through techniques like hypnotherapy, coaching, tapping (EFT), and the Sedona Method. By changing your beliefs, you allow the real you to emerge.
 
2) Use affirmations. Affirmations are positive statements that train your subconscious mind to develop new ways of thinking. Here are some self-love affirmations to get you started.
 
I love myself just the way I am.
I appreciate who I am right now.
I let go of my fears and go forward with confidence.
 
3) Appreciate yourself. Really look in the mirror. When was the last time you told yourself how beautiful or handsome you are? Loving what you see is an act of courage, a demand for unconditional acceptance. Last year when I was suffering with horrible hip pain and screaming my anguish, I confronted myself. The lies I’ve perpetrated. The ones that said I’m not beautiful. I’m not worthy. I am less than. I stood there with tears streaming down my face and said, “I love you.” At first I could barely whisper those words. But with each repetition my voice strengthened. As I confirmed the truth about me, the pain lessened until it finally disappeared and I acknowledged who I really am.
 
Start with what you DO like and really love that part of you. The more you do this, the more you’ll incorporate parts of you that you didn’t like before. And when you truly love yourself, others will too.
 
4) Be creative. Do you love to play with color, write, sing, make something with your hands? Give yourself permission to follow that voice that’s saying “can I, can I?” Play. Explore. Discover. Embracing your passions is a sure way to love yourself.
 
5) Practice forgiveness. Criticizing yourself or comparing yourself to others only hurts you. Sometimes it’s hard to remember you’re not perfect. But holding on to that resentment can cripple your body, literally. Forgiveness is a way to heal and move forward with peace and love. Say a forgiveness prayer faithfully—for at least 30 days— and watch those hurts begin to release and dissolve.
 
These are just a few ways to practice self-love and engage in loving thoughts. The more you love yourself, the more you step into your power. Experience the love that is rightfully yours. Let your light shine. Be the amazing person you can be.

[Originally published in the Conscious Life Journal​, March 2017]

​There are millions of self-help books written about success and how to achieve it. Jack Canfield wrote The Success Principles. Steven Covey wrote The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. There’s The Secret by Rhonda Byrne, How Successful People Think by John C. Maxwell, and Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill, to name a few. And every year more books are written. You’d think we haven’t figured it out.

I’ve read numerous self-help books on both personal and business success and still haven’t achieved the level that makes me feel accomplished. And many others are in the same place. Do you know why? The answer, for me, is that I wasn’t sure what I wanted.
 
People who get what they want have clear, measurable goals. Rather than saying, “I want to be rich,” they say, “I want to make $100K this year.” Rich is a vague concept. $100K is a measurable amount. If you make $99,999 you haven’t reached your goal.

​When I think about money, especially in terms of my business, I’m often unclear. I usually can’t make up my mind how much I want—$50K, $75K, $100K, or more. When I get into the larger numbers my conscious mind balks. “That’s too much,” it says, meaning it doesn’t think I can do it. But if I set my goal too low, then there’s a big piece of me that wants more.
 
So the first step in having what you want is to be clear about your goal.
 
This year I started reading The Path to Wealth: Seven Spiritual Steps to Financial Abundance by May McCarthy. The first thing that excited me about this book is that the 7 steps are listed in the Table of Contents. How easy is that? Then in the first chapter she gives you an overview of those steps and how you’re supposed to work with them each day. It couldn’t be simpler. The remainder of the book goes into more detail about each of the steps and offers additional help on reaching your goals. 
​

A huge portion of my spiritual growth right now is about deepening my connection to Spirit (God, Divine, Source) and trusting it to find my highest good. I used to be all about controlling the situation and only relying on myself. I felt I had to save all my money in order to have more, rather than being willing to give to receive. Those beliefs are changing. I began working the 7 steps on January 8 and am now into my second week. Each morning I thank my CSO (Chief Spiritual Officer) for all that I have (right now) and all that I will have (as if I already have it). The exercise is fun, exciting, and ever-changing. I haven’t seen a huge windfall of cash or an avalanche of clients, but I am much more at peace and excited about facing every day. And I know the abundance is there because I’m trusting in Source to deliver.
 
Another part of The Path to Wealth is beginning your day with reading something spiritual. McCarthy recommends the book The Game of Life and How to Play It by Florence Scovill Shin. It’s a small book written in 1925 by a metaphysical teacher and chock full of wonderful examples of using universal law and the correct wording to attract what you want. She gives story after story to illustrate her meaning. One of my favorite examples is about asking for more work. People often ask for more work (e.g., more clients) because they want more money. But they don’t specifically ask for more money. So she gives a simple rhyme to cover both bases:

I have a wonderful business
In a wonderful way
And I give a wonderful service
For wonderful pay.​
​

​Easy to say, easy to remember, and the wording is just right!
 
So do you have what you want? This is a brand new year, a year to have fun, to expand, to accelerate your growth, and to achieve those lofty goals. Be clear. Trust in Spirit. And expect miracles!

Rebecca Kirson 

I’m an observer . . . I’ve been honing that skill as far back as I can remember. I love to study people, the way they think, the way they process what happens to them in life, and how they choose to create their lives either from an empowered place in alignment with their truth and desires or one of being disgruntled, negative, and stuck in victim mode.  

What fascinates me is the space between these two opposite positions on the spectrum.  

Libraries have been written on both camps and why individuals end up choosing to affiliate themselves with one perspective over another (and yes, it is a choice).  

In my humble opinion, the simple difference between Camp A (empowered, aligned, and happy) and Camp B (disgruntled, negative, and a victim) is . . . ATTITUDE. 

A person on the left side of the spectrum generally displays an attitude of gratitude which generates feelings of happiness, expansion, and light heartedness.  Seriously, let’s look around at our reality. We live in one of the wealthiest countries in the world. We have freedom, choice, access to unlimited resources like technology and communication like no other time in history. We are surrounded by abundance, community, and creature comforts.  We have an unlimited amount of things to be thankful for! 

A person on the right side of the spectrum generally displays just an attitude.  They are continually finding things to complain about, rail against, and blame for their misfortune while spreading their toxicity.  A thought of gratitude couldn’t bubble up in their psyche if it had to because the perspective of being grateful is so far off from how they view the world. It’s impossible to feel thankful for all the wondrous things in your life while also feeling judgmental, critical, and negative.  Two unlike vibrations cannot exist in the same space.   They see what they don’t have and what they don’t like.  They focus on problems and because of their focus, more problems manifest.  

Camp A finds it difficult to relate to Camp B.  Camp B finds it difficult to relate to Camp A.  Two very different lenses from which to view the world.

Working in the personal and spiritual development arena, I have the opportunity to navigate both camps. I can share from experience in my own life and the people I’ve worked with . . . fulfillment and happiness will never be found through negativity and resisting “what is” in life.
  
An Attitude of Gratitude results in us having a life of blessings.

Why?  

Because when we recognize the good all around us and express emotions of gratitude and thanksgiving, more is given to us! 

Life is always demonstrating back to us who we are being. That includes our attitude. 

Beyond our annual celebration of Thanksgiving, let’s take some time to reflect on the perspective we bring each and every day to how we navigate our life.  
​
Is yours truly reflective of all that you have to be grateful for?

Rebecca Kirson, Akashic Record Practitioner and Transformational Coach with Your Sacred Truth, is a guest blogger and coauthor of F.A.I.T.H. – Finding Answers in the Heart, Volume II. To order your copy of this inspirational book, click here.

We’ve become wed (or welded) to our computers and electronic devices and beset with the need to interact on social media. If you’re not on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and 20 other sites I know nothing about, you’re living in the dark ages. So you blog and tweet and post pictures of your family, and everything’s great. Right?

Not so much. Every day it gets harder and harder to stand out in the crowd. What makes you different? Why should people care? If you don’t have an email list of 5,000 or 10,000 followers on Twitter, who will see you?  

One way to make people notice is to be authentic. Don’t copy everyone else. Be you. The real you. If you hate chocolate, say so. If you’re surrounded by dog lovers and you prefer cats, say so. If you’re unhappy with your circumstances and want change, say so. The more authentic you are, the easier it will be for people to know and understand you.

Being authentic does come with a warning. When you stand out people may not agree with you. They may dislike you. They may even oppose you. I’m not advocating fighting, belligerence, or even bad manners. You can be polite, and firm, and still be you. Your authentic self. And when you’re really “you” the people around you who disagree will fade away and the people who want more of you will be attracted.

This month the authors of FAITH, Volume II discuss authenticity and how it affects you and the people around you. Come join us. It’s a wonderful, magical, uplifting process. Try it. I dare you. 

Nanette Littlestone, author, editor, writing coach, and publisher, is a frequent blogger and visionary leader behind F.A.I.T.H. – Finding Answers in the Heart, Volumes I and II. To find out more about these books, click here. 

by Corinna Murray, DVM
 
The privilege of a lifetime is being who you are. - Joseph Campbell

Most of us were taught to believe that it is better to give than to receive. We believe it is virtuous to give our time, love, energy, and attention to our family, friends, and worthy causes. Yet most of us find it uncomfortable to treat ourselves in the same manner and, therefore, feel unworthy to receive many of these same things from others. In fact, many have been conditioned to believe that self-directed love and attention is selfish.

In reality, giving and receiving are aspects of the same flow of energy, just as breathing depends equally on the inhale as on the exhale. The quality and depth of the in-breath nourishes our bodies with life sustaining O2, stimulating growth and expansion, while the out-breath releases what no longer serves us, calming our bodies for healing and rest. What no longer serves us is in turn returned to serve our planet through our plants, which nourish us again with oxygen and their fruit. The flow of love is the same. It is self-sustaining, expansive, and infinite.

Self-directed love is the foundation for the expression and the flow of love. Only by loving your perfectly imperfect self (who in any given moment is doing your best, with what you know and how you feel), can you open fully to the generous love of the universe and the love of others. Self-love is healing, nurturing, and honors All that has and will continue to contribute to your existence. The way in which you care for and engage with yourself shows the world and others how to love you. It becomes your legacy and opens you to the flow that is reflected back. Only from this place of self-love, can you truly be whole and capable of returning love to the rhythm and flow of life.

Start today to hold yourself in loving awareness and let your heart receive. Connect with and feel how much you want to know that you are loved and valued. Look into your heart and feel your timelessness. Feel everything—your joy and your sorrow, your compassion and your passion, your curiosity, playfulness, and wisdom. You contain it All. You are whole. Each time you find yourself in self-reflection today, take a moment to be a witness. Then, with loving awareness, quietly say or think these words, "I feel you, I accept you, I love you." Carry this mantra through your day and witness your heart gently open to yourself and to others. Notice the flow of love.

By Suzanne Baker Hogan
 
I love you so completely. I adore you infinitely and forever. I want you to know that you are never alone in your life, and that I am here with you always. I understand you through everything, no matter what. And I admire how you are living your experiences on earth.
 
I will always support you, without question, even if others cannot. I am always on your side, and I know that things haven’t been easy. I know how deeply you feel in your life and how challenging your challenges have been. They have pushed you to the edge of what you can handle, but handle them you have with courage and perseverance. It’s time to applaud yourself for this!
 
For you have met every difficulty and acted accordingly. You have seized the experiences you wished to have, and you have played them out perfectly. No one could have done a better job.
 
Your life has been absolutely perfect. And it has brought you to this moment of precious reckoning. It has led you to the greatest experience you will ever know. And that is to finally love yourself, deeply and without question, and to never forget this again.  
 
Now I know that the world makes this difficult. I know how easily things can make you seem “not good enough.” But somewhere within, you know that this is not real and that you are so incredibly special. Deep down you fully believe in yourself.
 
You came here to remember this with conviction and to overcome anything telling you otherwise. You came here to heal the pain in you that cries out, and in that healing, rediscover yourself. You are here to love yourself, above all else, and in that remembering grow forever empowered!
 
You see, you are so very powerful, and you’ve got the universe on your side, even if it doesn’t look like it. You are infinitely loved and infinitely cherished, beyond what humanness can comprehend. If only you knew just how admired you are for your bravery and how much you actually belong. You are so deeply beautiful and wise beyond your dreams. Indeed, you are royalty from the spiritual realms.
 
I know all of this with the utmost certainty because I am you and always have been. You and I are one and the same, and we are more immense than you can imagine. We simply came to this earth to gain invaluable experience and to grow ever stronger with love.
 
At the end of the day, all that matters is love. It is all that remains of our earthly ordeals and relationships. Love is what we are made of and what interconnects us all. Love is our inherent oneness.
 
This is the love that always shines within you, and it radiates when you remember who you are. This is the love that illuminates the world when you love yourself with all of your soul! 

Suzanne Baker Hogan, spiritual writer and author of SharetheSpiritual.com and Twin Flame Help, is a guest blogger and coauthor of F.A.I.T.H. – Finding Answers in the Heart, Volume II. To pre-order your copy of this inspirational book, click here. 

by Maureen Roe

Generally when we think of love we think of romantic love and the faces of our loved ones. Seldom in that delicious reverie do we include ourselves.  Why, you ask?  It is from not knowing how to love ourselves that we tend to just skip that part and pretend we do.   

If you were to go down the list of ways to love yourself you may find the following:

• Take time to do things you enjoy
• Engage in activities that use your talents and gifts
• Reward yourself
• Spend time in the company of those you feel good around
• Learn something new so that you can feel accomplished
• Do something nice for others

While this is not an exhaustive list, it will help you feel good and even warm and fuzzy about yourself. However, the list seems to lack what most “love-yourself”  instructions do and that is how we talk to ourselves. Imagine you are doing things you enjoy from the list above and you run into someone who constantly makes you feel inadequate.  Suddenly, you are into the most negative tirade of self-talk you can muster.

One of the most uplifting activities you can do to raise your spirit from the ashes of verbal self-flagellation and find peace within is to stop self-judgment and self-criticism.  When you criticize or judge, you create a greater sense of unworthiness and insecurity.  If you are committed to feeling good about yourself, first you must feel “good enough” inside.

Here’s a quick exercise you can use to create a judgment-free zone within your head.

• Step 1:   Become aware of when you use judging and criticizing self-talk.

• Step 2:   Once you are aware you can stop and/or re-phrase with a positive statement before you start. The statement may not sound true in the beginning, but after continued use you'll be amazed at the results.

Loving yourself in this manner will add a greater sense of joy, security, and peace to your spirit.  

What will achieving a greater sense of self-love look like for you?

Maureen Roe is a Self-Expression Coach, Registered Corporate Coach, Metaphysical Minister, Ageless Grace Educator, speaker, and co-author of F.A.I.T.H. – Finding Answers in the Heart, Volume II. To pre-order your copy of this inspirational book, click here.

by Angela Rodriguez

New beginnings, a perfect topic for the beginning of a new year. A time where everyone feels the collective consciousness to make great changes in their lives. For instance, the infamous gym membership, or maybe cutting out sugar and carbs. Or possibly making a decision to stay in or step out of an unfulfilling job or relationship. Maybe it's the desire to finally sign up for classes to finish your degree. 

All are great ideas that sadly always seem to falter after 20-30 days. We fall back into our comfort zones. We forget how amazing and creative we are and fall back out of alignment with Source and unconditional love for ourselves. Daily life churns and we continue to put ourselves second, third, fourth, etc. 

What then, dear ones, makes those new beginnings "stick"? Desire doesn't seem to be enough. What is the answer?

Perhaps the answer is already staring you in the face. When there is something that you long for, or you feel needs to change, listen intently to this inner calling. It is Guidance beckoning you to step forward. Beckoning you to say YES! 

YOU have all the solutions, you just need to ASK, LISTEN, and TRUST. The Universe has your best interest always on its mind and is in constant motion to bring you what is in alignment for your soul. 

Ask and it is given! Ask, Listen, and Trust.

Angela Rodriguez, Sergeant of Police for the San Francisco Police Department, an Advanced Reiki Practitioner, and Intermediate Channel, is a guest blogger and coauthor of F.A.I.T.H. – Finding Answers in the Heart, Volume II. To pre-order your copy of this inspirational book, click here. 

by Rebecca Kirson

The facilitator of a recent training I attended discussed how hockey legend Wayne Gretzky was able to stay ahead of his competitors game after game. When asked how he did it, Wayne replied, “I skate to where the puck is going to be, not where it has been.” 

We have the power to start living from where our life is going, not where we have been.

Sit with that for a moment.

So many people live their lives not 70 to 80 years, but the same year 70 to 90 times. Why? Because they hold so tight to who they were 10 years ago, 5 years ago, last year . . . They can’t let go of the past to create the dreams they say they yearn for now.  

We are powerfully creating our reality every moment of every day based on our thoughts and emotions. Yet every single time we direct our thoughts to the fear and resentment of “what happened before” with our relationships, with our finances, with our careers, we continue to re-create that reality again and again.  That’s why a lot of people feel like they are stuck in the movie Groundhog Day.

In order to create NEW in your life, you have to allow new thoughts, creativity, and inspiration to flow in and to start living with a focus on where your life is going, not where it has been.  You already know the story of playing small, settling with mediocrity, and hiding your light.  Why do you keep rereading that chapter when the rest of the book needs to be written?

A simple foolproof test will answer that for you.  If you look at what you have created in all areas of your life, what do you see?  Are you proud of your art or would you rather throw a sheet over it?  Your life is a direct reflection of who you are being:  your consciousness and energy / your awareness and frequency. 

You have unlimited potential inside of you waiting to be expressed in physical form as the effect of your life.  You ARE creating continually.  The decision is whether it’s a Picasso or a paint-by-number book you picked up at the clearance rack in Walmart.

I encourage you to step into your vision for 2015. What new reality do you want to create for yourself?  What changes do you have to make to meet the aspects of yourself that are trying to emerge? What action steps can you take now to start encoding your present with the future you wish to create?

They call it the NEW YEAR for a reason.  Tap into infinite possibilities and make this the year you go beyond just thinking about it. 

To your success!