​Self-care isn’t always about indulging yourself in manicures and late-night movies (although those are really important). Self-care is about doing what’s needed to have the life you want, no matter how difficult it may seem: Speaking up to your best friend or your boss, recycling the clothes you’ll never fit into no matter how many diets you try, asking for professional help so you can resolve your relationship or insomnia or whatever isn’t working. Now, more than ever, is the time for you to take care of you. The stronger and more centered you are, the easier it will be to weather what crops up.
 
Following are ten ways to step up your positive attitude and overall well-being:

1. Say what you mean. Are you afraid to express yourself because you’ll hurt someone’s feelings or your words might be misconstrued? Speaking up is much more than just saying “no.” When you don’t express yourself or stuff your feelings, people don’t have the opportunity to see and know the real you. Being true to yourself not only empowers you, it empowers those around you. So don’t be afraid to speak your truth. When you say what you mean you honor yourself and you give others the chance to know you, the real you, the one they’re longing to know.
2. Take baby steps. Whatever your goal, you don’t have to get there today. Or even tomorrow. Trying to get there too fast can cause stress and frustration and bring up feelings of “I’m not good enough” or “why can’t I be like him/her?” Remember the wise saying, “All good things come to those who wait.” Picture the Buddha and see yourself smiling and patient. Make one new change in your lifestyle and see how that goes. When that’s working well, then add something else. Take baby steps. There’s no hurry.
3. Let go of the past. Isn’t it amazing how hard it is to let go? Those events that transpired eons ago—the raise you didn’t get, the relationship that failed, a family member saying you’ll never amount to anything—can still create feelings of fear, anger, shame, guilt. And all that’s doing is ruining your current life. It’s time to let those puppies go. You don’t have to be stuck with that baggage. Coaching, energy healing, therapy, meditation, inner child work, tapping, there are hundreds of methods to help you access those memories and transform them. And when you rewrite the past, you create a brand new present.
4. Connect with Spirit. It doesn’t matter whether you believe in God or the Divine or simply an energy that binds us all together. Seeing, understanding, believing, or knowing about that connection serves to calm you. You could be exercising or deep breathing or just looking at a flower, something that transports you out of your typical awareness. When you’re in that “zone,” you feel a deep inner peace that can transcend time and space. Those little moments are like nectar to your body, mind, and soul.
5. Appreciate yourself. To paraphrase Elizabeth Barrett Browning, “How do you love yourself? Can you count the ways?” Appreciation goes farther than skin deep. It penetrates to the core of your being and radiates beyond. The more you love yourself, the more lovable you become. We all have our flaws and faults, but this is about finding the things you like. Do you love your eyes, the way you support your friends and family, how you find joy in the little things? Start a list of the things you appreciate, at least one per day, and tell yourself how much you love that quality. Before you know it you’ll be in love with YOU.
6. Reward yourself. Are you searching for acknowledgment? Recognition? A little praise? You don’t have to wait for someone else to give it. Give it to yourself! It’s easy to overlook all the little things you do—cleaning the house, exercising, finishing that painting. But all those things matter and create space for the bigger things—an inviting home, a well-toned body, winning first place at the art show. Acknowledge your successes and reward yourself (the reward begins a pattern of self-acknowledgment). Take a bubble bath with lighted candles and soft music. Indulge in that dark chocolate. Buy yourself a new dress. You deserve it!
7. Get up and move. Exercise may be a dreaded word, but the body is designed to move. Exercise improves your mood, increases endorphins, and decreases stress. So get up and move! You don’t have to join a gym. Even little movements can help. Try stretching or ease into yoga or qigong. Walking outdoors is fantastic. Or dust off your stationary bicycle or elliptical machine. If you’re at work and you only have a minute or two, get up from your desk and take a brisk walk around the office. Movement makes the body happy and a happy body means a happier you.
8. Be grateful. Giving thanks is one of the most important aspects of self-care. If you do nothing else, be grateful for who you are and what you have. As in self-appreciation, find something to be thankful for—your job, your friends, your spouse, your health, your house, the food you eat, the ground under your feet. Nothing is too small. Giving thanks creates a beautiful vibration that increases your prosperity and attracts more to be thankful for. [Try the thirty-day experiment in Thank and Grow Rich by Pam Grout.]
9. Laugh and play. When was the last time you felt like a little kid? Remember playtime? Hopscotch, jump rope, hide and seek, jacks? Games that made you laugh and squeal with pleasure? Your inner child is still with you, wanting to come out and play. Fun lights up your soul and makes you radiate with joy. So dip your toes into a nearby lake, pull out the croquet set, play some badminton or horseshoes or miniature golf. Get your joy on! You might be surprised how wonderful you feel.
10. Follow your dreams. Now that you’ve revitalized your inner child, take a moment and recapture your dreams. What did you want to be when you grew up? Dreams are fueled by your imagination, and your imagination is endless. If you wanted to be a painter, what about a painting class? If you thought about writing, try an online course or join a writer’s group. If you wanted to be an astronaut, visit a space camp. It’s never too late. Creativity and exploration are like candy to your soul. So let your imagination loose and explore. You’ll feel recharged and restored.

 
There’s no guarantee that life won’t throw you more curve-balls. As we all know, it’s a crazy obstacle course. But if you use some or all of the steps here, you will be a happier, healthier, and more prosperous YOU.

[Originally published in the Conscious Life Journal, ​July 2018]

In the beginning there was only Love and Love settled upon the Earth and held it in its stillness, until all upon the Earth breathed in and out in unison. Now we’re in the twenty-first century where we race for the cheapest places to shop, the fastest route from point A to point B, and the easiest way to get things done. Technology is no longer the playground of advanced science but the common ground for our current lifestyle of electronics, hybrid cars, fast food, and much more. We are connected via phones and computers but disconnected from each other.
 
We have forgotten the concept of universal energy, proved to a more modern world by Albert Einstein with his famous equation about relativity. But centuries before Einstein there were cultures around the world that understood the energy that permeates every living thing—Japanese (Ki), Chinese (Chi), Sanskrit (Prana), Lakota Sioux (Neyatoneyah), Hebrew (Ruach or Roohah), Tibetan (Lung), and so forth.
 
Not only does the familiar phrase “we are all energy” hold true, but that energy that flows through us, between us, among us, and around us, binds us to every other living thing. At the heart of it all is a oneness, a connectedness not just to other humans, but to plants and trees, birds, animals, insects, the oceans, even the very ground we stand on. When you go outside and sink your feet into the grass in your front yard, you send an energy signal to Mother Earth to feel your vibrations, to open a channel of connectivity, to harmonize with your energy. If, at the moment of connecting, you’re feeling happy or joyful or grateful, you bless the earth with positivity. If you’re feeling angry, anxious, or sad, then you imbue those feelings into the ground.
 
Everything we do, think, and feel becomes part of the fabric of our environment, the people around us, the community we live in, and so on. The butterfly effect, whose name was coined by meteorologist Edward Lorenz, shows how the smallest of actions—the flapping of a butterfly’s wings—can cause major upheaval in another location and time. The first precept of Buddhism states, “I undertake the training to avoid taking the life of beings.” The word being applies to all living things, not just humans. Pesky mosquitoes, rodents that carry diseases, unwanted plants and trees are all part of that edict. We’ve been conditioned to believe that it’s okay to kill or remove or get rid of these beings as part of daily life because everyone else does the same. But as we awaken, as consciousness raises, as the collective becomes more enlightened, perhaps it’s time to change our habits and embrace more loving selves.
 
North Georgian Tom Blue Wolf talks about “all our relations,” the thread of life, of energy that connects all living things. We experience this life in the early morning birdsong, the running of sap through an old growth tree, the rush of clear spring water in a stream near a garden, the majestic wonder of a deer standing in silent salute. These pieces of life ask nothing from us and exist without our doing, yet how much more significant might they be if we looked on them with more consciousness?
           
 
There’s a profound grace that comes with the attentiveness of being more conscious. Through the awareness of the breath, the simple act of noticing the inhale and exhale, we can begin to experience that deeper connection, that quiet that resounds with energy, that relation to all things. Even one moment is beneficial and carries tremendous importance. Imagine everyone, everywhere, doing the same thing, being in that space of awareness.
           
What would happen if we were all to breathe as one?

[Originally published in the Conscious Life Journal​, September 2017]

Do you love yourself only when you feel good? What about when you fail a test, don’t get a raise, or can’t fit into your new clothes? What if you could really love yourself all the time?
 
The term “self-love” means the love of oneself, the instinct or desire to promote one’s own well-being. True self-love is not narcissistic or self-indulgent but an awareness of your inner power.  Self-love acknowledges who you are and what you like. Those stirrings inside you (a love of nature, playing with color, writing songs, rescuing animals) are meant to point your way. By cultivating your gifts, you show your true passions to the world. Your light illuminates the way for others and allows them to shine as well.
 
How do you start loving yourself? Here are five ways to begin the journey.
 
1) Address self-sabotage. Does your inner voice say you’re not good enough, not smart enough, not pretty enough? Those negative thoughts stem from past experience and are lodged in your unconscious. Before you can practice self-love you need to let them go. You can heal these thoughts through techniques like hypnotherapy, coaching, tapping (EFT), and the Sedona Method. By changing your beliefs, you allow the real you to emerge.
 
2) Use affirmations. Affirmations are positive statements that train your subconscious mind to develop new ways of thinking. Here are some self-love affirmations to get you started.
 
I love myself just the way I am.
I appreciate who I am right now.
I let go of my fears and go forward with confidence.
 
3) Appreciate yourself. Really look in the mirror. When was the last time you told yourself how beautiful or handsome you are? Loving what you see is an act of courage, a demand for unconditional acceptance. Last year when I was suffering with horrible hip pain and screaming my anguish, I confronted myself. The lies I’ve perpetrated. The ones that said I’m not beautiful. I’m not worthy. I am less than. I stood there with tears streaming down my face and said, “I love you.” At first I could barely whisper those words. But with each repetition my voice strengthened. As I confirmed the truth about me, the pain lessened until it finally disappeared and I acknowledged who I really am.
 
Start with what you DO like and really love that part of you. The more you do this, the more you’ll incorporate parts of you that you didn’t like before. And when you truly love yourself, others will too.
 
4) Be creative. Do you love to play with color, write, sing, make something with your hands? Give yourself permission to follow that voice that’s saying “can I, can I?” Play. Explore. Discover. Embracing your passions is a sure way to love yourself.
 
5) Practice forgiveness. Criticizing yourself or comparing yourself to others only hurts you. Sometimes it’s hard to remember you’re not perfect. But holding on to that resentment can cripple your body, literally. Forgiveness is a way to heal and move forward with peace and love. Say a forgiveness prayer faithfully—for at least 30 days— and watch those hurts begin to release and dissolve.
 
These are just a few ways to practice self-love and engage in loving thoughts. The more you love yourself, the more you step into your power. Experience the love that is rightfully yours. Let your light shine. Be the amazing person you can be.

[Originally published in the Conscious Life Journal​, March 2017]

​There are millions of self-help books written about success and how to achieve it. Jack Canfield wrote The Success Principles. Steven Covey wrote The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. There’s The Secret by Rhonda Byrne, How Successful People Think by John C. Maxwell, and Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill, to name a few. And every year more books are written. You’d think we haven’t figured it out.

I’ve read numerous self-help books on both personal and business success and still haven’t achieved the level that makes me feel accomplished. And many others are in the same place. Do you know why? The answer, for me, is that I wasn’t sure what I wanted.
 
People who get what they want have clear, measurable goals. Rather than saying, “I want to be rich,” they say, “I want to make $100K this year.” Rich is a vague concept. $100K is a measurable amount. If you make $99,999 you haven’t reached your goal.

​When I think about money, especially in terms of my business, I’m often unclear. I usually can’t make up my mind how much I want—$50K, $75K, $100K, or more. When I get into the larger numbers my conscious mind balks. “That’s too much,” it says, meaning it doesn’t think I can do it. But if I set my goal too low, then there’s a big piece of me that wants more.
 
So the first step in having what you want is to be clear about your goal.
 
This year I started reading The Path to Wealth: Seven Spiritual Steps to Financial Abundance by May McCarthy. The first thing that excited me about this book is that the 7 steps are listed in the Table of Contents. How easy is that? Then in the first chapter she gives you an overview of those steps and how you’re supposed to work with them each day. It couldn’t be simpler. The remainder of the book goes into more detail about each of the steps and offers additional help on reaching your goals. 
​

A huge portion of my spiritual growth right now is about deepening my connection to Spirit (God, Divine, Source) and trusting it to find my highest good. I used to be all about controlling the situation and only relying on myself. I felt I had to save all my money in order to have more, rather than being willing to give to receive. Those beliefs are changing. I began working the 7 steps on January 8 and am now into my second week. Each morning I thank my CSO (Chief Spiritual Officer) for all that I have (right now) and all that I will have (as if I already have it). The exercise is fun, exciting, and ever-changing. I haven’t seen a huge windfall of cash or an avalanche of clients, but I am much more at peace and excited about facing every day. And I know the abundance is there because I’m trusting in Source to deliver.
 
Another part of The Path to Wealth is beginning your day with reading something spiritual. McCarthy recommends the book The Game of Life and How to Play It by Florence Scovill Shin. It’s a small book written in 1925 by a metaphysical teacher and chock full of wonderful examples of using universal law and the correct wording to attract what you want. She gives story after story to illustrate her meaning. One of my favorite examples is about asking for more work. People often ask for more work (e.g., more clients) because they want more money. But they don’t specifically ask for more money. So she gives a simple rhyme to cover both bases:

I have a wonderful business
In a wonderful way
And I give a wonderful service
For wonderful pay.​
​

​Easy to say, easy to remember, and the wording is just right!
 
So do you have what you want? This is a brand new year, a year to have fun, to expand, to accelerate your growth, and to achieve those lofty goals. Be clear. Trust in Spirit. And expect miracles!

​Poem by Azizi Blissett 

​breathe In 
breathe Out 
breathe Once 
breathe Twice 
breathe Deep 
breathe Slow 

Surrender to the rhythm 

push Once 
pull Twice 

Surrender to the rhythm 

tense In 
tense Out 

Surrender to the rhythm 

exhale 
inhale 

Surrender to the rhythm 

grip Hard 
grip Tight 

Surrender to the rhythm 

thrust Up 
thrust Down 

Surrender to the rhythm 

move In 
move Out 

press Back 
press Forward 
stand Firm 
stand Still 

Surrender to the rhythm 
open Wide 
close Shut 

Surrender to the rhythm 
Experience the rhythm 
my rhythm 
of letting go

Azizi Blissett, Law of Attraction Life Coach and Founder and Executive Director of zFusion, is a guest blogger and coauthor of F.A.I.T.H. – Finding Answers in the Heart, Volume II. To order your copy of this inspirational book, click here.

by Corinna Murray

What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us. —Ralph Waldo Emerson


Authentic self-expression of ourselves is an integral part of living a balanced and meaningful life because that is how we contribute our unique qualities and gifts to the world. At times we may be reluctant to express ourselves openly because we feel vulnerable, exposed, or even misunderstood. Yet when we hold back and play safe and small, we sabotage our potential and restrict our ability to contribute and connect. When we align with our authentic flow of self, expressing our truth, we access a way of being that goes beyond the superficial display of our personality. We connect to a way of being that communicates our essential truth through our essence in voice, behavior, and even through our quiet presence.

Self-awareness is essential to authentic self-expression, just as it is to spiritual growth. When we gain awareness about the way we approach life and look at the world, we can only then notice that we choose our experiences. If our perspective is one of fear, frustration, or anger, then our self-expression will also be filtered through those same negative emotions, recreating old emotional patterns and behaviors. If our perspective is one of love, acceptance, and gratitude, we open to our natural state of positive self-expression and we begin to transform our reality. When we communicate from our core selves with our pure voice, it becomes simple, gentle, accepting, and appreciative. In this flow of emotional awareness and expression, we are able to share our true selves with the world through our intentions, thoughts, speech, and actions. When we are truly conscious of our purest self, life flows naturally, sweetly, and effortlessly. We don’t need to struggle to feel understood. It is simply enough to be present and aware.

When you make a commitment to be who you really are and make choices that allow you to express yourself like no one else can, you connect to that place within where your inner truth resides. You open to allow your truth and creativity to radiate your unique essence and contribution to life. By creating clear intentions that come from your inner truth, with awareness and choice, you dissolve your potential for self-sabotage. This is the prelude to sweet success. Trust the intelligence of nature to manage the details. 

Today, set an intention for clear communication from your heart. Allow it to manifest in the ordinary experience of the day as it unfolds. No one else can be who you are. No one else can fulfill your role in life. The simple truth that you were created requires you to come forward to be and express your true self. When you do, you encourage everyone else to shine from their true selves as well. Today, simply remember that you are an essential life force, here to shine your light into the world in your own irreplaceable way.

Corinna Murray, DVM, CPC is a veterinarian, iPEC Certified Professional Coach, and founder of EnHABiT and Veterinary Care Navigation. She is a guest blogger and coauthor of F.A.I.T.H. – Finding Answers in the Heart, Volume II. To order your copy of this inspirational book, click here.

by Maureen Roe

If only I could go back and count the times in my life that I touted myself as being logical. For the most part, I am. Logic makes sense to me and I can get behind it and follow it without a problem. So when I reached a certain age, I wondered why I seemed to walk to the beat of a different drum. In most things in life, my thinking patterns are very rational, but in certain arenas I frustrate people or make them uneasy because that logic I am famous for seems to run and hide.

In my late 30's I learned I have a balanced brain. After some testing it was determined that I use both sides of my brain equally, meaning I don't only use logic (right brain) to make a decision; I also use my creative left brain. While the linear logical thinkers saw the steps laid out, I could also see another nonlinear creative way to address the issue. This explained why I would frustrate people with my occasional indecision, especially when it was a big issue.   

Society tends to produce a lot of linear thinkers. When your life is not logical and you don't progress to the next step when expected, you will experience some unpleasantness from those linear thinkers because suddenly they won't understand you.  Ask any single lady who isn't married by the time she's 30, anyone who is married at least a year and hasn't yet produced a grandchild, someone who decides to take off a year before going to college, or someone who just can't seem to decide what they want to be when they grow up and bounce around from one career to another trying this and that.  Believe me, you will get some very interesting tirades.

For those of you out there who follow your heart, your vision, your dream, and meet this pushback from society, I applaud you. Daring to be different and following those dreams, no matter how long it takes, requires guts and lots of faith.  So often you get disheartened because your dream doesn’t come when you expect. Then judgment from family and friends starts the descent into shame, embarrassment, depression, and endless questions, all while you feel your soul urging you to continue to seek and find. Or you simply give up on your dream.

It has taken close to 40 years to see my dream coming to fruition. If you think I haven't felt embarrassed because I couldn't spell out what it was my soul was asking me to do, you'd be mistaken. But that small nonlinear portion of me allowed me to roam and explore numerous ways to accomplish what I wanted. I like to think that Thomas Edison and I have something in common. I'm not a failure. I’ve just found many ways in which to utilize my skills.

If you are struggling with a similar search for your dream, don't give up. Don't let others convince you that it has to be done in logical steps that might not be your way. Be true to your soul's calling and your authentic self. That way you can stay true to your dreams.

Maureen Roe is a Self-Expression Coach, Registered Corporate Coach, Metaphysical Minister, Ageless Grace Educator, speaker, and co-author of F.A.I.T.H. – Finding Answers in the Heart, Volume II. To order your copy of this inspirational book, click here.

by Linda Goodman

When “I” is replaced by “We,” even Illness turns into Wellness. You are not alone in your quest for WELLNESS and Complete Health of Body, Mind, and Spirit, but Knowing Thyself is an important component.

Paul Chek, a health coach, trainer and rehabilitator, identifies six elements of Health:
• Thinking
• Nutrition
• Movement
• Sleeping
• Hydration
• Breathing

You may take a different view of the true definition of good health, but the mind-body connection has been proven; thus, our thoughts should be the first quality we consider. IF there are self-defeating thought patterns or non-interaction, perhaps the focus on self has become such a primary source of information that we don’t recognize we might be out of balance. Interactions can help distract one from discomforts, and laughter is known for its healing power. Daniel Amen of PBS fame suggests “Brain Health” (which involves ALL of the above) is the way to add more vitality and alertness to the years we have.

In a simpler society, going to a healer for being disheartened or decline in the body would have led to these questions:
• When did you stop dancing?
• When did you stop singing?
• When did stories stop inspiring you?
• When did you forget to seek silence?

Asking these questions of ourselves might bring us deeper into knowing our bodies and recognizing unhealthy patterns. Negative self-talk isn’t the way to a healthier self; ACTING upon a newer and healthier habit is.

Studies confirm that chronic stress weakens the immune system. So if you notice you’re keeping a stomachache, or a tight neck, or yelling more and reacting rather than calmly stepping back and responding, consider relaxation techniques that are right for you—walking, yoga, meditating, a massage, sitting quietly in nature. Relaxation is good for the wellness of your Entire Being.

To bring your wellness into balance:

1) Begin a journal and write down, daily: Feelings, Thoughts, Three things that bring gratitude, and note what beliefs or actions might help in getting healthier.

2) Conscious decision-making is a good investment in our health and all other parts of our lives. Walk mindfully, barefoot in the grass, slowly and deliberately. Develop a mantra to guide you on your road to complete health. Or breathe in four stages: Breathe in – Renew and Reaffirm, then Breathe out – Release and Review.  BREATHE mindfully and be aware of NOT holding your breath while anxious.

3) If there’s trauma or a serious medical condition (whether physical or mental) go to a qualified professional, immediately. Reviews, resource materials, and websites will allow you to find someone whose personality and bedside manner is a good fit. Chronic illnesses and pain management need the patient’s Active Participation. Everyone deserves the best care and attention by someone who listens and can provide a healing modality that is right for each situation. Don’t give up until you find what helps you remember how to regain Joy and Dance.

by Maureen Roe

The most essential health one should be concerned with is well-being. While your physical well-being is critical, mental well-being seems to govern the entire system. Our mental health is important and there is a direct correlation between our negative thoughts and how we feel in our bodies. If you disagree, think of a day when things don't go well and your thoughts tend to be less than positive. From that point you cannot turn the situation around and by evening you feel tired, run down, maybe even achy and in pain.  

Working on my self-development solidly now for two decades, I have spent little time suffering emotionally or physically.  Because of some structural issues my body is not without its daily pains, but my focus is on me "feeling good." My "feeling good" in my mind directly correlates to the kind of day I am going to have.  
If you have a stressful lifestyle, this is for you. While many jobs today are very high pressure, many people who have been laid off will tell you that the thought of going back into that kind of setting is not an option. This has driven many to focus on entrepreneurial opportunities to try to find more balance. For example, I am willing to make less money and not have the latest iPhone, iPad, or watch in order to have a 2-hour lunch where I can meditate and gain greater perspective for my life and family, my clients and my work. Your quality of life is not written by some advertising guru. It is what you decide is important to you.

If your life balance is on a teeter totter, then re-evaluate your values and decide what you really want your life to be and not what your friends, the movie stars or the TV, tell you is the good life.

To get started:

1) Make and prioritize a list of the things you value in life, what is important to you (family, relationships, peace, religion, education, money, travel, etc.).

2) Consider each item above in terms of how far away you are from the desired state and determine what you'll need to happen to feel the way you wish to feel. Do you need to add, delete, or change something to be happier?

3) Once you consider ways that you can change your situation to move closer to your desired state, then sit back and think about how it will feel when these changes are made. Use your prioritizing to determine which of these items you will change first.

If you have trouble with this exercise and would like to get some help, please feel free to contact me at maureen@maureenroecoaching.com to set up a complimentary appointment time to help guide you through this exercise.

Maureen Roe is a Self-Expression Coach, Registered Corporate Coach, Metaphysical Minister, Ageless Grace Educator, speaker, and co-author of F.A.I.T.H. – Finding Answers in the Heart, Volume II. To order your copy of this inspirational book, click here.